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Home > Fun Stuff > A Few Top Ten Lists
A Few Top Ten Lists
Top ten least manly ways to die:
10) Choking on strudel.
9) Waltzing off the edge of the Empire State Building.
8) Being mauled by the Easter Bunny.
7) Flushing yourself down the toilet.
6) Tripping on your own dress tail, falling down one stair.
5) Nicking yourself while shaving your legs.
4) Killer Canary.
3) Severe paper cut.
2) Killed in kickboxing match with Johnny "No Legs" Johnson.
1) Crocheting accident.
Top ten most manly ways to die:
10) Killed in kickboxing match with Satan.
9) Caught in gears of combine.
8) Hit in head with a 30 pound sledge.
7) Diving into a swimming pool filled with shards of broken glass.
6) Gnawing off your own arm to escape a hunter's trap.
5) Going 18 years without sleeping.
4) Attempting to swallow side of beef... whole.
3) Testing your own flammability.
2) Accidentally bathing in molten steel.
1) Bleeding to death after pulling off your own head in a bet.
Top ten things you least want to say in a dark alley:
10) "Of COURSE those are all real diamonds I'm wearing"
9) "I can't believe I'm actually walking down the street with incriminating pictures of the police chief in my pocket!"
8) "Let's leave the keys to my new Porsche with your crippled little brother while we go to the club for a few hours."
7) "People say this a bad section of town.... Just look at all these wimps, I could take 'em all on at once!"
6) "Hey Bob! Five bucks says I can hit one of those kids wearing a "Raiders" hat with this rock!"
5) "I hate people on Welfare. They should just go out and get some money."
4) "Is that you? Without my glasses on I couldn't identify my own mother."
3) "Spam Lite? Hey! That's my favorite too!"
2) "Wow! I didn't know I had this $100 bill in my wallet!"
1) "I almost wish someone would shoot me so I could test out my bulletproof vest."
Top ten ways to tell if your girlfriend is a lesbian:
10) She holds hands with other girls.
9) She hugs other girls.
8) She wears another girls pants, while the other girl is wearing them too.
7) She watches Cinemax more than you do.
6) She buys seductive lingerie, but asks you to wear it.
5) You are girl.
4) She says stuff like, why can't you be more feminine.
3) She says things like "My last girlfri... I mean boyfriend.."
2) She reads Maxim Magazine
1) She calls out your sisters name in the sack.
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